Tickling Someone Who Doesn’t Like it – Clueless Or Sadistic?
In a recent article, I discussed the question of whether tickling (of a child, friend, or boyfriend/girlfriend) is just good clean fun, or whether it can be considered abuse. Interestingly, in researching both articles, I discovered that most results for the searches “tickle abuse,” “tickling abuse,” and “tickling as abuse” were for erotic websites.
When I read that first article to a group of professional colleagues, I was surprised at the response: it,” in fact, everyone started nodding knowingly, and a couple people had their own stories to tell while I wasn’t sure if anyone would “get. Clearly, I became onto something.
exactly why is tickling so popular, and just how does it fly underneath the radar as a kind of abuse?
in my opinion the clear answer is based on the fact the victim involuntarily disguises his / her own discomfort (both physical and emotional) utilizing the resulting laughter that is involuntary. Even if the tickler knows that the one being tickled doesn’t like it, he or she can plead ignorance of the fact by drawing attention to the merriment that is apparent of victim.
While many ticklers may, in reality, be oblivious to your pain these are generally causing, others do know for sure plus don’t care. During my research, i stumbled upon tickle abuse victims who stated which they did not like it that they told their tormentors (between tickle sessions. Pre-arranged “stop” signals were ignored. And it might be worth noting that the tickle abusers mentioned were, except for a stepmother, male–husband, boyfriend, father, or older brother–and virtually always bigger, sometimes by quite a margin.
Now think about the discoveries that are following Victims described their tormentors as “sadistic” and “bully.”
o A tickler dad called his sons “sissies” when they complained.
o Victims stated me down so I can’t get away,” “he doesn’t take me seriously when I say ‘stop’,” “I can’t defend myself,” and “I thought I was going to die.”
o that”he pins Victims stated which they could not breathe, cried, choked, gagged, wet their pants, felt sick, and/or vomited.
o One victim called tickling “an tool that is awful of.”
I will mention again that several cultures that are ancient used tickling as a kind of torture.
In summary, while somebody who enjoys tickling others, may, for some time, pull off the declare that he knows it but doesn’t care that he(or she) doesn’t realize the victim isn’t having fun, it quickly becomes clear. Not respecting another person’s boundaries is abuse. Restraining a person against that person’s will is abuse. Touching a person in a real way she or he does not want to be touched is abuse. Period.
If you may be a victim of abusive tickling, know with you, and/or get out of the relationship.
If that you have every right to complain, ask for help, call the authorities, ask your tormentor to go for counseling you are the tickle abuser, stop. Get help. Find an outlet that is acceptable your aggressions. And/or leave.
#Tickling #Doesnt #Clueless #Sadistic
(*)Tickling somebody who does not enjoy it – Clueless Or Sadistic? (*)